MERRY CHRISTMAS IN LAWYER'S TERMS

PLEASE ACCEPT WITHOUT OBLIGATION, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED,

THESE BEST WISHES FOR AN ENVIRONMENTALLY SAFE,

SOCIALLY RESPONSIBLE, LOW STRESS, NON ADDICTIVE,

AND GENDER NEUTRAL CELEBRATION OF THE WINTER

SOLSTICE HOLIDAY AS PRACTICED WITHIN THE MOST

ENJOYABLE TRADITIONS OF THE RELIGIOUS PERSUASION

OF YOUR CHOICE (BUT WITH RESPECT FOR THE RELIGIOUS

OR SECULAR PERSUASIONS AND/OR TRADITIONS OF OTHERS,

OR FOR THEIR CHOICE NOT TO PRACTICE RELIGIOUS OR

SECULAR TRADITIONS AT ALL) AND FURTHER FOR A

FISCALLY SUCCESSFUL, PERSONALLY FULFILLING, AND MEDICALLY

UNCOMPLICATED ONSET OF THE GENERALLY ACCEPTED

CALENDAR YEAR (INCLUDING, BUT NOT LIMITED TO,

THE CHRISTIAN CALENDAR, BUT NOT WITHOUT DUE

RESPECT FOR THE CALENDARS OF CHOICE OF OTHER CULTURES).

THE PRECEDING WISHES ARE EXTENDED WITHOUT REGARD

TO THE RACE, CREED, COLOUR, AGE, PHYSICAL ABILITY,

RELIGIOUS FAITH, CHOICE OF COMPUTER PLATFORM,

OR SEXUAL PREFERENCE OF THE WISHEE(S).