SOME MORE FATHER'S DAY JOKES

MY DAD THINKS HE WEARS THE TROUSERS IN OUR HOUSE,

BUT IT'S ALWAYS MUM WHO TELLS HIM WHICH PAIR TO PUT ON!

ONE EVENING A LITTLE GIRL AND HER PARENTS WERE

SITTING AROUND THE TABLE EATING SUPPER.

THE LITTLE GIRL SAID, "DADDY, YOU'RE THE BOSS,

AREN'T YOU?" HER DADDY SMILED, PLEASED, AND SAID YES.

THE LITTLE GIRL CONTINUED

"THAT'S BECAUSE MUMMY PUT YOU IN CHARGE, RIGHT?"

SCIENCE TEACHER: 

WHEN IS THE BOILING POINT REACHED?

SCIENCE STUDENT: 

WHEN MY FATHER SEES MY REPORT CARD!

JOE: WHAT DOES YOUR FATHER DO FOR A LIVING?

JON: HE’S A MAGICIAN. HE PERFORMS TRICKS,

LIKE SAWING PEOPLE IN HALF.

JOE: DO YOU HAVE ANY BROTHERS OR SISTERS?

JON: YEP, FOUR HALF-SISTERS AND A HALF-BROTHER.

DAN: I MADE A BAD MISTAKE TODAY AND GAVE MY

DAD SOME SOAP FLAKES INSTEAD OF CORN FLAKES FOR BREAKFAST.
JAN: WAS HE MAD?

DAN: YUP. HE WAS FOAMING AT THE MOUTH!

DAD: SON, IF YOU KEEP PULLING MY HAIR,

YOU WILL HAVE TO GET OFF MY SHOULDERS.

TIGER CUB: BUT, DAD, I’M JUST TRYING TO GET MY GUM BACK!