A FEW THOUGHTS

CAN YOU SEE YOURSELF IN SOME OF THESE?

MY GOAL FOR 2015 WAS TO LOSE JUST 10 POUNDS.

ONLY 15 TO GO.

ATE SALAD FOR DINNER!

MOSTLY CROUTONS & TOMATOES.

REALLY JUST ONE BIG, ROUND CROUTON COVERED
WITH TOMATO SAUCE. AND CHEESE.
FINE, IT  WAS A PIZZA.

I ATE A PIZZA.

HOW TO PREPARE TOFU:
1. THROW IT IN THE TRASH.
2. GRILL SOME MEAT.

I DON'T MEAN TO BRAG BUT......I FINISHED MY 14-DAY
DIET IN 3 HOURS AND 20 MINUTES.

A RECENT STUDY HAS FOUND THAT WOMEN WHO
CARRY A LITTLE EXTRA WEIGHT LIVE LONGER THAN THE

MEN WHO MENTION IT.

KIDS TODAY DON'T KNOW HOW EASY THEY HAVE IT.

WHEN I WAS YOUNG, I HAD TO WALK 9 FEET THROUGH
SHAG CARPET TO CHANGE A TV CHANNEL.

SENILITY HAS BEEN A SMOOTH TRANSITION FOR ME.

I DID A WEEK'S WORTH OF CARDIO AFTER

WALKING INTO A SPIDER WEB.

REMEMBER BACK WHEN WE WERE KIDS AND EVERY

TIME IT WAS BELOW ZERO OUT THEY CLOSED SCHOOL?
ME NEITHER.

I MAY NOT BE THAT FUNNY OR ATHLETIC

OR GOOD-LOOKING OR SMART.

OR TALENTED . . . . OOPS, I FORGOT

WHERE I WAS GOING WITH THIS.

I LOVE BEING OVER 50.

I LEARN SOMETHING NEW EVERY DAY.......AND

FORGET 5 OTHERS.

THINK I'LL PUT AN "OUT OF ORDER"

STICKER ON MY FOREHEAD AND CALL IT A DAY.