THINGS THAT EVERYBODY KNOWS BUT NOBODY WANTS TO ADMIT

THAT WE'VE READ THE MESSAGE EVEN IF THERE IS

NO "SEEN" (VIA EMAIL, USING AIRPLANE MODE, ETC)

THAT SOMEBODY SOMEWHERE IS HAVING AN

EVEN WORSE DAY THAN WE ARE

THAT ONE DAY OUR BODIES WILL GET OLD AND SAGGY

THAT MOST GROUPS OF KIDS CURSE WHEN

ADULTS AREN'T AROUND. AND MOST GROUPS OF

ADULTS CURSE WHEN KIDS AREN'T AROUND.

BUT NEITHER GROUP DOES IT IN FRONT OF THE

OTHER BECAUSE PARENTS DON'T WANT TO

ACCEPT THAT KIDS KNOW THOSE WORDS

AND KIDS DON'T WANT TO GET IN TROUBLE.

THAT THERE ARE ACTUALLY STUPID QUESTIONS.

LOTS OF STUPID QUESTIONS.

THAT YOU'RE NOT GOING TO WIN LOTTERY

THAT YOU'RE NEVER GOING TO BE A

PROFESSIONAL ATHLETE

THAT SEEING A POLICE CAR IN THEIR REAR VIEW

MAKES YOU FEEL SCARED AND NOT SAFE

THAT POOP PARTICLES FLY ALL AROUND THE

BATHROOM WHENEVER YOU FLUSH