THE ULTIMATE COMPUTER

THE ULTIMATE COMPUTER

STOOD AT THE END OF THE

ULTIMATE COMPUTER COMPANY'S

PRODUCTION LINE.

AT WHICH POINT THE GUIDED

TOUR EVENTUALLY ARRIVED.

THE SALESMAN STEPPED

FORWARD TO GIVE HIS PREPARED DEMO.

"THIS," HE SAID, "IS THE

ULTIMATE COMPUTER.

IT WILL GIVE AN INTELLIGENT

ANSWER TO ANY QUESTION

YOU MAY CARE TO ASK IT."

A SMART-ALEC WHO RAN A

HUMOUR MAILING LIST

STEPPED FORWARD AND ASKED,

"WHERE IS MY FATHER?"

THERE WAS THE SOFT HUM

OF POWERFUL ELECTRONIC GEAR

GOING TO THE TASK.

PANEL LIGHTS LIT AND BLINKED

AND WITHIN A COUPLE OF SECONDS

THE LASER PRINTER PRINTED

OUT A PIECE OF PAPER:

"FISHING OFF FLORIDA."

THE SMART-ALEC LAUGHED,

"ACTUALLY, MY FATHER IS DEAD!

IT WAS A TRICK QUESTION."

THE SALESMAN, QUICKLY

THINKING ON HIS FEET,

REPLIED THAT HE WAS SORRY

THE ANSWER WAS UNSATISFACTORY,

BUT AS THE ULTIMATE COMPUTER

WAS PRECISE, PERHAPS A REWORDING

OF THE QUESTION MIGHT WORK BETTER.

THE SMART-ALEC SAID TO

THE ULTIMATE COMPUTER,

"WHERE IS MY MOTHER'S HUSBAND?"

AGAIN, THE HUM OF THE

POWERFUL ELECTRONIC BRAIN

FILLED THE ROOM.

AFTER A MOMENT,

THE LASER PRINTER

WHIRRED TO LIFE.

THE PAPER SAID,

"DEAD. BUT YOUR FATHER IS

STILL FISHING OFF FLORIDA."