THE CAT

We were dressed and ready to go out for a

Dinner & Theatre evening.

We turned on a 'night light',

turned the answering machine on,

covered our pet budgie and

put the cat in the back garden.

We phoned the local Taxi company

and requested a taxi.

The taxi arrived and we opened the

front door to leave the house.

As we walked out the door,

the cat we had put out in the yard

scooted back into the house. 

We didn't want the cat shut in the house

because she always tries to get at the budgie.

My wife walked on out to the taxi,

while I went back inside to get the cat. 

The cat ran upstairs, with me in hot pursuit.

Waiting in the cab,

my wife didn't want the driver to know

that the house will be empty for the night. 

So, she explained to the taxi driver

that I would be out soon.

"He's just going upstairs to say goodbye to my mother."

A few minutes later,

I got into the cab.

"Sorry I took so long," I said,

as we drove away.

"That stupid bitch was hiding under the bed.

I had to poke her arse with a coat hanger

to get her to come out! 

She tried to take off,

so I grabbed her by the neck.

Then, I had to wrap her in a blanket

to keep her from scratching me.

But it worked!

I hauled her fat arse downstairs and

threw her out into the back garden!
She'd better not shit in the

vegetable garden again!"

The silence in the Taxi was deafening.