WHEN GRANDMA GOES TO COURT
Added on: 15th Apr 2015
Lawyers should never ask a Grandma
a question if they aren't prepared
for the answer.
In a trial in Mississippi, a Southern
small-town prosecuting attorney
called his first witness to the stand,
a grandmotherly, elderly woman.
He approached her and asked,
"Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"
She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you,
Mr. Williams. I've known you since you
were a boy, and frankly you've been a big
disappointment to me. You lie, you
cheat on your wife, and you
manipulate people and talk about
them behind their backs.
You think you're a big shot,
when you haven't got the brains to realize
you'll never amount to anything
more than a two-bit paper pusher.
Yes, I know you."
The lawyer was stunned.
Not knowing what else to do,
he pointed across the room and asked,
"Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"
She again replied,
"Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley
since he was a youngster, too.
He's lazy, bigoted, and he has
a drinking problem.
He can't build a normal relationship
with anyone, and his law practice is one of
the worst in the entire state,
not to mention, he cheated on his wife
with three different women.
One of them was your wife.
Yes, I know him."
The defense attorney nearly died on the spot.
The judge asked both counselors to
approach the bench and,
in a very quiet voice, said...
"If either of you idiots ask her
if she knows me,
I'll send you both to the electric chair."