Bad Dog Needs Rotten Home



Added on: 5th May 2015


On the first day God created the cow.


God said, "You must go to the field with the

farmer all day long and suffer under the sun,

have calves, and give milk to support the farmer

I will give you a life span of sixty years."


The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life...

you want me to live for sixty years.

Let me have twenty years and

I'll give back the other forty."

And God agreed.


On the second day, God created the dog.

God said, "Sit all day by the door of your house

and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past.

I will give you a life span of twenty years."


The dog said, "That's too long to be barking.

Give me ten years and I'll give back the other ten."

So God agreed (sigh).


On the third day God created the monkey.

God said, "Entertain people, do monkey tricks,

make them laugh. I'll give you a twenty year life span."


The monkey said, "How boring,

monkey tricks for twenty years? I don't think so.

The dog gave you back ten,

so that's what I'll do too, okay?"

And God agreed again.


On the fourth day God created man.

God said, "Eat, sleep, play, have sex, enjoy.

Do nothing, just enjoy, enjoy.

I'll give you twenty years."


Man said, "What? Only twenty years?.

Tell you what, I'll take my twenty and

the forty the cow gave you back,

the ten the dog gave you back

and the ten the monkey gave you back.

That makes eighty, okay?"

"Okay," said God. "You've got a deal."


So, that is why for the first twenty years

we eat, sleep, play, have sex,

enjoy and do nothing.

For the next forty years we slave

in the sun to support our family;

for the next ten years we do monkey tricks

to entertain our grandchildren;

and for the last ten years

we sit in front of the house

and bark at everybody.


old man in a rocking chair  animation


View by Month