ETHEL

ETHEL

If you don't laugh at this one, you're dead!

Ethel was a bit of a demon in her wheelchair, 
   and loved to charge around the nursing home, 
   taking corners on one wheel 
   and getting up to maximum speed on the long corridors.

Because the poor woman was one sandwich short of a picnic 
   the other residents tolerated her and some of them actually joined in.

One day Ethel was speeding up one corridor 
   when a door opened and Kooky Clarence 
   stepped out with his arm outstretched. 
   'STOP!,' he shouted in a firm voice. 
   'Have you got a license for that thing?' 
   Ethel fished around in her handbag 
   and pulled out a Kit Kat wrapper 
   and held it up to him. 
   'OK' he said,
   and away Ethel sped down the hall.

As she took the corner near the TV lounge on one wheel, 
   weird Harold popped out in front of her 
   and shouted 'STOP!
   Have you got proof of insurance?' 
   Ethel dug into her handbag, 
   pulled out a drink coaster 
   and held it up to him. 
   Harold nodded and said
   'On your way, Ma'am.'

As Ethel neared the final corridor,
   Crazy Craig stepped out in front of her, 
   Butt-Naked, and holding 
   his 'You-Know-What' in his hand.
   
    'Oh, good grief,' yelled Ethel,     
 
    'Not that Damn Breathalyzer Test again.!!!'   

(NOW I DON'T CARE WHO YOU ARE, THAT'S FUNNY!)