NEWLYWED

Maria just got married and

being a traditional Italian,

she was still a virgin.

So, on her wedding night,

staying at her mother's house,

she was nervous.

But her mother reassured her.

"Don't worry, Maria.

Tony's a good man.

Go upstairs, and he'll take care of you." 

So up she went.

When she got upstairs,

Tony took off his shirt and exposed his

hairy chest.

Maria ran downstairs to her mother and says,

"Mama, mama, Tony's

got a big hairy chest."

"Don't worry, Maria",

says the mother,

"All good men have hairy chests.

 Go upstairs. He'll take good care of you."

So, up she went again.

When she got up in the bedroom,

Tony took off his pants exposing his hairy legs.

Again Maria ran downstairs

to her mother.

"Mama, Mama, Tony took off his pants

and he's got hairy legs, too!"

"Don't worry. All good men have hairy legs.

Tony's a good man.

Go upstairs, and he'll take good care of you."

So, up she went again.

When she got up there,

Tony took off his socks

and on his left foot he was missing three toes.

When Maria saw this,

she ran downstairs.

"Mama, Mama,

Tony's got a foot and a half!"

"Stay here and stir the pasta",

says the mother,

"this is a job for Mama!"